How Dogs and Men Are the Same

Both take up too much space on the bed.
Both have irrational fears about vacuum cleaning.
Both are threatened by their own kind.
Both mark their territory.
Both are bad at asking you questions.
Neither tells you what's bothering them.
Both tend to smell riper with age.
Both have an inordinate fascination with women's crotches.
The smaller ones tend to be more nervous.
Neither does any dishes.
Both fart shamelessly.
Neither of them notice when you get your hair cut.
Both are suspicious of the postman.
Both like dominance games.
Neither knows how to talk on the telephone.
Neither understands what you see in cats.

source: Heartless Bitches International